Having a Grateful Heart

Today is my mother's birthday. (08/30)


If only I could remember the last time I told her Happy Birthday, or even celebrated her birthday.  It's been a long time to say the least.

It's been going on ten years since I left home.  I ponder, wonder and take a step back to reflect on life and where it's taken me thus far.  I think about the obstacles it's thrown me, the blows I've encountered and sometimes I still feel the whiplash from it.

It has been a while since the last time I wrote.  I won't lie to you, life has been SO HARD!!! I have struggled with my faith in God, my marriage has suffered, relationships with family have been hindered and I've been so unmotivated and overall depressed.

I realize that every person has their own struggles, their own hurts and pain from life.  At some point, you have to accept where the cards have fallen, pick yourself up and try to move on.

That's what I've been working on.  And I want to share with you my perspective and how I got to this point.  In the mean time, let's play catch up..

Since I've last written.....

We had to put our kitty, Carlos down. (A week after our daughter had passed)

Our landlord fake "evicted" us.  (Purposely did not cash a rent check, her boyfriend was working for my husband, Jez and it didn't work out..)

We had to up and move in a week's time period, to Whitney, TX. (45 minutes further from where we were before, and a total hour from my work which I had just moved to in June)

That's all the "bad" but it literally threw me through the ringer.

Here's the good.....

We got a camper, a decent one!

I sold my truck, bought a fairly used car and paid off my loan.

Added a new addition to our family, a puppy Rottweiler, Pablo :)

Owner financing our current property and bought an additional piece behind us.

My husband has been so busy with our construction company.

The moral of this story is....there's always way more good than bad when you break it down.

I've been seeing a Christian counselor, which I am released from now unless I feel I need to go back again.  I had a breakthrough with her which ended our sessions together.

During August, not sure when exactly, the A/C in the camper stopped working.....yes, STOPPED!

It was during that moment, I actually laughed with my husband and realized that life CAN ALWAYS BE WORSE!!!!

So as much as I despised moving, hated our circumstance, was hateful and distant from people that love me and overall a monster to be around......I realized that if God wanted to, He could make my situation worse and give me more trials than we had already been through.

I made a CHOICE to make the best of my situation. I made a CHOICE to accept life where it is now. I made a CHOICE to be happy!

And the crazy part is, we had talked about having a big dog on a piece of property that was ours.  We had talked about the mom car and the camper.  It just didn't happen the way I wanted it to happen!  But God hears the desires of our hearts.  He HEARS us and we have to have the FAITH and accept that His plan is greater than our own.

God never says that it won't be easy.  He never says that we won't struggle.  But He DOES say that He will walk with us, every step of the way and carry us through it when we are at our weakest.

So today, I encourage you to be grateful.  Look at where you were 5 years ago, or even 10, then look at where you are today.  Look at the growth, the obstacles you've overcome, and the countless blessings you've been given.



"Through it all, through it all, my eyes are on you.  Through it all, through it all, it is well.  It is well, with my soul."

Pablo!

My mom car :) 

Our cute camper